Where do you live?
Today I was having a frustrating day. It wasn't directed at any particular person or event - but was more an accumulation of events that aggravate my patience. Now, I have blogged about my patience in the past - and when it comes to the really important things in life, I feel I have excellent patience. People are often surprised when I tell them that I often struggle with patience, but when it comes to some of the day-to-day things that really shouldn't push my buttons - it happens.
Back to today. It started with two of my kids waking up REALLY EARLY and than feeling less than terrific. Once everyone seemed back to form we piled into the car for a trip to the bank and then Home Depot. When we got to Home Depot - my wife and I both realized neither of us brought our wallet (how does that happen) - so we needed to go back home to get it. We did. Once back at the Depot - service wasn't at its height (I am being nice). Our 20 minute trip turned into an hour. Kids got restless - dad got restless - you get the point. We then had to take the paint we purchased to finish our errands at another stop - at which point the kids were cranky, hungry, and tired (or maybe it was just me). At that point, I was definitely in a funk (not to be mistaken for feeling funky!).
I was taking a lot of deep breaths because I really needed to shake my mental funk. Hearing my 10 week old son screaming for what felt like hours (probably minutes) made it hard - so I tried to take my thoughts back to peaceful prayers and a smidgen of perspective.
Bottom line - I needed a new residence for my thoughts. I needed to move.
So I did.
Where I was living mentally didn't feel too good - and it was beginning to poison everything and everyone around me. That is pretty much what our thoughts do.
Coaching has reinforced for me that it really doesn't matter who you are, where you "physically" live, or how much money you make that brings happiness and peace - but rather it is the foundation of your beliefs that determine how you see the world.
Your beliefs create your perception - and then your perception creates your reality.
It is yours - no one else's!
So...where do you live?
What are your beliefs about work, career, happiness, success, and relationships based on? Is it a positive and good foundation of beliefs - or is it fearful, skeptical, and daunting? Do you think there might be a correlation between your beliefs on these topics - to you current reality?
I am guessing yes!
In Stephen Covey's "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" he talks a great deal about the paradigms we live by as individuals. He writes, "To try to change outward attitudes and behaviors does very little good in the long run if we fail to examine the basic paradigms from which those attitudes and behaviors flow."
i.e. - you can't fake authenticity, sincerity, and truth - if it isn't part of your core.
He also adds, "Each of us tends to think we see things as they are, that we are objective. But this is not the case. We see the world, not as it is, but as we are -- or, as we are conditioned to see it. When we open our mouths to describe what we see, we in effect describe ourselves, our perceptions, our paradigms." Then lastly, "Where we stand depends on where we sit."
Where do you live?
How do you describe yourself...friends...work..etc.?
Abraham Lincoln (a pretty decent President) may have been on to something when he said, "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."
Mary Baker Eddy also writes, "Our false views of life hide eternal harmony, and produce the ills of which we complain."
Where do you live?
Do you like your neighbors? Do you like your boss and co-workers? Do you like yourself?
To get out of my funk - I needed to recognize where I was living - and remember this was "my perception" and no one else's. It was no one's fault but my own.
I took responsibility - and realized this was an inside job - instead of waiting for the world to change for me. That sounds kind of silly - doesn't it?
Guess what! I am not going to disown my kids after all (at least for one more day). Phew!
If you need some help sprucing up your mental property - I am always happy to talk!
Much love!
Travis
Back to today. It started with two of my kids waking up REALLY EARLY and than feeling less than terrific. Once everyone seemed back to form we piled into the car for a trip to the bank and then Home Depot. When we got to Home Depot - my wife and I both realized neither of us brought our wallet (how does that happen) - so we needed to go back home to get it. We did. Once back at the Depot - service wasn't at its height (I am being nice). Our 20 minute trip turned into an hour. Kids got restless - dad got restless - you get the point. We then had to take the paint we purchased to finish our errands at another stop - at which point the kids were cranky, hungry, and tired (or maybe it was just me). At that point, I was definitely in a funk (not to be mistaken for feeling funky!).
I was taking a lot of deep breaths because I really needed to shake my mental funk. Hearing my 10 week old son screaming for what felt like hours (probably minutes) made it hard - so I tried to take my thoughts back to peaceful prayers and a smidgen of perspective.
Bottom line - I needed a new residence for my thoughts. I needed to move.
So I did.
Where I was living mentally didn't feel too good - and it was beginning to poison everything and everyone around me. That is pretty much what our thoughts do.
Coaching has reinforced for me that it really doesn't matter who you are, where you "physically" live, or how much money you make that brings happiness and peace - but rather it is the foundation of your beliefs that determine how you see the world.
Your beliefs create your perception - and then your perception creates your reality.
It is yours - no one else's!
So...where do you live?
What are your beliefs about work, career, happiness, success, and relationships based on? Is it a positive and good foundation of beliefs - or is it fearful, skeptical, and daunting? Do you think there might be a correlation between your beliefs on these topics - to you current reality?
I am guessing yes!
In Stephen Covey's "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" he talks a great deal about the paradigms we live by as individuals. He writes, "To try to change outward attitudes and behaviors does very little good in the long run if we fail to examine the basic paradigms from which those attitudes and behaviors flow."
i.e. - you can't fake authenticity, sincerity, and truth - if it isn't part of your core.
He also adds, "Each of us tends to think we see things as they are, that we are objective. But this is not the case. We see the world, not as it is, but as we are -- or, as we are conditioned to see it. When we open our mouths to describe what we see, we in effect describe ourselves, our perceptions, our paradigms." Then lastly, "Where we stand depends on where we sit."
Where do you live?
How do you describe yourself...friends...work..etc.?
Abraham Lincoln (a pretty decent President) may have been on to something when he said, "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."
Mary Baker Eddy also writes, "Our false views of life hide eternal harmony, and produce the ills of which we complain."
Where do you live?
Do you like your neighbors? Do you like your boss and co-workers? Do you like yourself?
To get out of my funk - I needed to recognize where I was living - and remember this was "my perception" and no one else's. It was no one's fault but my own.
I took responsibility - and realized this was an inside job - instead of waiting for the world to change for me. That sounds kind of silly - doesn't it?
Guess what! I am not going to disown my kids after all (at least for one more day). Phew!
If you need some help sprucing up your mental property - I am always happy to talk!
Much love!
Travis
Labels: Abraham Lincoln, direct life coaching, mary baker eddy, Seven Habits of Highly effective people, Stephen Covey
2 Comments:
right on again....i love how you open up my world of thought..and hopefully the change will come..
Thank you for a great post! I remember what it was like to try to get things done with young children. It's a huge challenge not to allow what they are doing to affect our mood. That lesson never really stops.... when they grow a little they become moody teenagers.
I like the concept of owning your your own perception 'instead of waiting for the world to change.' Thanks for the insights.
Aileen
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