Direct Life Coaching

Oh, but how difficult that really is...isn't it? Enjoying the moment...easy to say, but not so easy to do.

We are good at tricking ourselves into thinking we are enjoying the moment - but often our thought is already on to "what's next?" We, especially adults rarely take time to enjoy what we have right here, right now, in this very moment.

Why should anything else matter?

Why? Because there are bills to pay, errands to run, and people to take care of. Right? But what about right now? Now! What are you doing right now?

Instead of jetting off during your kids soccer practice to get another errand done, just watch him for a second. Don't "go there"...but be here! Instead of picking up your cell phone while on your walk to check in with someone, don't go there, but be “here.” Here is good! Here is perfect. Take a breath, breathe it in. Look around, enjoy it! Yes, life is good right now!

"Life is just a series of "here's" that we miss by always being there!" - Me

Is it okay to quote myself?

This is the most profound idea I could come up with for the week. I am on the precipice (love that word) of another crazy week. Monday will be normal - yet crazy in the evening, and then Tuesday I am gone doing a training all day (getting up at 4:30 am...yikes). Then, Wednesday through Saturday I will be in Miami doing some fun stuff for the Superbowl (more on that later), then rushing back to Jupiter Saturday night for an improv show, then back to Miami on Sunday for the Superbowl. All of this, plus trying to see my wife and kids, and welcoming my brother and his fam in town for a few days.

In preparing for this week I have already propelled my thought into certain moments I am envisioning. Some real fun - others really stressful. I have worried about time, not being late, getting caught in traffic, not seeing the family enough, not being funny, not having a good show, being tired, etc. All of this thinking keeps putting me "there," instead of being here!

Here I am...at peace! A million things still to do "there," but comfortable and confident here.

I took some extra time last night before bed to pray about my work and my week. I thought about God-Love as my Father and Mother, and how the whole week was wrapped and guided in harmony. I envisioned seeing every detail and task as unfolding in a timely fashion because everything is operating within the law of Love. God's perfect love. Then again, reminding myself that "out there" thinking causes fear, stress, and worry - but "here" thinking reaffirms peace, order, and protection.

In Science and Health, Mary Baker Eddy takes the Lord's Prayer and gives it her spiritual interpretation. For "Thy kingdom come," she interprets afterward, "Thy kingdom is come; Thou art ever-present."

That is how I am thinking of God's love right now - as ever-present, and that it is here now, not "there!"

So, wherever you are, whatever you are doing - you can always be "here," because "here" is all you ever have. And, as I am trying to learn myself, "here" is all we ever need :)

Much love!

Travis

PS - The Superbowl work I was mentioning refers to an open casting call I entered and was selected for. It's for the Web site called www.igotshotgun.com. This is a GM sponsored site - and they are taking normal "Joe's" like me and having us cover the Superbowl festivities leading up to the big day. So, I will be down in South Beach with a camera crew causing some friendly trouble with our cameras ;) So, starting Wednesday night, you can start checking www.igotshotgun.com to see what we are experiencing. We will be updating the site every night!

Wish me luck!

Did that grab you like it grabbed me?

Weird. I was sitting at the breakfast table with my two kids, not thinking about blogs or spirituality - and for some reason that title popped in my head, "The other side of fear."

Okay, what am I supposed to do with that?

It's like Spirit accidentally blurted out a random phrase without any context. I might as well of heard - "Cobras love tortillas!" (Which could be true)

What's the deal? It's 8:00 in the morning, I am sitting down to a healthy bowl of Apple Jacks - and now I need to make sense of the angel message, "The Other Side of Fear."

So, I thought, what is the other side of fear? It felt dark and heavy - intimidating. But then I thought, wouldn't the other side of fear mean that you got past fear? You conquered it. It's in the past - you are now on the other side!

Cool - so the other side of fear is like its opposite. So, the other side of fear must be...courage?

Maybe...sometimes. How about understanding? Faith. Trust. Those all work!

But...why in the heck am I still thinking about this? Then my thought continued...

"What would it feel like to live life without any fear?"

Whoah! That's a Keanu moment.

Life without fear. Hmmmm...okay, that's a tough one to imagine...sad to say.

In my opinion, whether we know it or not, we let fear dictate a whole lot of our lives. We all know that we live in a fearful country (US), but fear has a way of sneaking into the details of our life. Such as, what you really want to do with your life.

Are you doing it? If not, why?

Now, all those logical things you just listed off in your head - are any of them (or all of them) really just the extension of some deep-seated fear? It might be doubt in your personal ability (guilty), fear of the unknown (been there), or just a fear that no one else has ever done it that way? Oh, we could rationally list plenty of reasons of why we shouldn't do something that we aspire to do - but if fear is at the heart of that reasoning - you need to get to the other side.

When I lost my full-time employment back in Spring '05 (yikes - time flies when you don't work for the man ;) ...I remember thinking and praying that I was going to keep my thought open to new opportunities - whether I thought I could do the job or not. I figured that as long as the opportunity felt like a pure expression of who I was as a person - I would not say "no" to it. Even if I was afraid of my lack of experience - I wasn't going to allow fear to be the determining factor. Two years later - I am still saying "yes!"

A week after I started praying about staying open and "saying yes" a friend called me to host her prestigious 4-day conference in Washington DC. I had never hosted a conference before - but it sounded fun - so I said yes! That same week I got elected to take a position in our church that would be demanding and new - and although I had never done it before - I said yes! A few months later some friends of mine asked me to start this blog. I had never blogged before - but I said yes! When a new friend of mine asked me if I would be in a movie he was creating - I said yes (okay - that was a no-brainer). When I heard about a local company that worked with at-risk youth I decided I wanted to help too. When they asked me to try to create a training workshop on anger management and life choices - I said yes. I had never created a full-day workshop before, but it was for a good cause - and I knew people would be blessed as a result. Yes...yes...yes!

I believe that all of these opportunities that came to me represented an aspect of who I wanted to be as a person - but I had to get to the other side of fear to experience them. If not, I would come up with plenty of "rational" reasons of why I should not do them.

In Science and Health, Mary Baker Eddy writes, "We should master fear, instead of cultivating it." Think again about those things you really want to do in your life, but aren't. Think of your mental garden - what are YOU cultivating?

For those of you who have demonstrated getting or living on the other side of fear - I would love to hear your story. Heck, maybe it will become a book some day.

In the meantime, I really need to find out if cobras do indeed love tortillas!

Much love!

Travis

P.S. - If you want to get an e-mail update each week whenever there is a new blog - just send me an e-mail to ththomas@adelphia.net.

Also, make sure you check out more inspiring blogs on SpiritontheJob.com

"You never get a second chance to make a first impression!" How many times have we heard that...and I am talking in addition to Head and Shoulders commercials. We are a country that is all about "impressing." It's probably one of the main causes when we're not feeling satisfied with what we're doing - because we are always wondering if what we're doing is "impressing" others.

Or...maybe I'm alone...am I?

Think of the clothes you wear, the car you drive, the iPod...the kind of coffee you drink. Please - how many of us buy Starbucks just so we can carry the hip cup? Yes, we know who we are!

But where does it get us? Does it ever end?

No! And if you believe otherwise...I'm sorry :(

I got thinking a lot about the need to impress as I was running the other day. I was thinking about my different activities going on - especially improv - and I wasn't really impressing myself. So, I started thinking about my purpose statement R.E.A.P. (see previous blogs if you are unfamiliar), and if you remember, the "R" stands for "Reflect only Love." The more I thought about that the more I realized what a contradiction it was from trying to impress others.

Impressing is a very egotistical quality. It becomes all about "you." Reflecting on the other hand, well that to me means that I am not the source of the action or quality - but my only job is to bring it to life or light by reflecting the source. For example, a disco ball doesn't produce any light - it's only job is to reflect the light that originates from the source. The reflection is beautiful, dynamic, and infinite - but it is not the creator. So, put simply...

Spirit = Source
Travis = Reflection

Travis' job is only to reflect the Source - but Travis is not the Source.

Looking at it from this perspective reminded me of a motto I learned in Sunday School - "Your job is to express, not impress!"

This makes my life a whole lot easier. If my only job is to express, it takes a way a lot of the pressure of feeling like I need to be the originator of ideas. Instead, I stay conscious of my thoughts to make sure I am staying open to the constant and continuous inspiration and guidance of Spirit.

Saturday morning I was feeling frustrated because our show the night before didn't work out like I had planned. It was a culmination of things having nothing to do with our performance, yet I was still frustrated. Finally, I decided that I needed to snap out of the funk and stop dwelling on the negative. If I truly believe that Spirit is surrounding every situation - then all I need to do is stay open and express Spirit the best I can by "Reflecting only Love." The thought came to me that wherever you go, you are surrounded by opportunity. Well, sure enough, a few minutes later a friend called to tell me about a very exciting project that could be coming our way. I was expecting results with my change of attitude, but this was pretty darn quick ;)

I'll keep you posted to see if this project comes about, but regardless, I am trying to do a better job of being the best expression I can be - and letting the rest take care of itself. As Eddy simply states in Science and Health, "God is Love. Can we ask Him to be more?"

I guess there is nothing more for God to do - so all I need to do is reflect.

Like they say - you never get a second chance to make a first expression!

Travis

PS - If you want to get an e-mail whenever there is a new blog (and you are not currently on the list) - send me an e-mail to ththomas@adelphia.net

The holidays are gone for another year - but there is one scene from a favorite film of mine that seems pretty relevant right now. You know the movie, "A Christmas Story," (especially with TNT's 24 hour marathon) the scene when Ralphie is helping his dad change the spare tire and all of the lug nuts get tossed into the air. In that moment Ralphie utters "Owww Fudge!" It all happens in slow motion, and much to Ralphie's demise - fudge isn't the "F" word that comes out.

Believe it or not - I had my Ralphie moment the other night, but with my wife!

Oh Fudge!

Hear me out, I didn't cuss at her, it wasn't like that. But, we were walking back from dinner with the kids, and for a couple of different reasons I was feeling very anxious - my buttons were being pushed - and in the heat of the moment (and in front of the kids) I said something to her that I shouldn't have. (AGAIN - I REPEAT - NO CUSSING WAS INVOLVED)

Cue slow motion.

Even as the words were coming out - I knew I had made a mistake. Like a machine set in motion that could not be stopped, my words spun from my mouth, and I desperately wished I could grab them and swallow them up. But I couldn't.

Now, I felt justified in my frustration, and I had a 10-minute walk home to convince myself that I didn't need to feel bad for my outburst. But I did. I was ashamed of myself. I wasn't sure how I was going to respond from here. I was awaiting a further battle back home - and there was a good chance things would get worse before they got better. I even had a few things I still wanted to say - but what was the point?

I let my anxiety and frustration get the best of me - and now I felt like a failure.

For the next few minutes I let all of these other feelings pile on top of me. Failure, discouragement, embarrassment, doubt, self-pity, humiliation. I am not sure how it happened - but all of these guys couldn't wait to crash my party ;)

Besides, here I am doing these workshops recently where I am teaching people how to handle their emotions and responses - and now look how I responded? Good example I am.

But then a few minutes later - enough was enough. I knew that I could not change what I had done, but I could definitely learn from it.

Self-justification wasn't the answer. Sure, I had valid reasons for being frustrated, but that still didn't make my outburst right. That was all on me.

Self-pity wasn't the answer either. Yes, I screwed up - but allowing my thoughts to spiral down a road of destruction wouldn't help either.

Instead, I spent a few minutes identifying what it really was that got me anxious in the first place. What led me to the outburst? What could I have done to squash some of those feelings, and what can I do so that I don't make the same mistake twice.

Well, this line of thought was much more productive and helpful, and by the time I got home, my wife had obviously cleared her head as well - and we were able to finish the night without any further confrontations. (Plus it probably helped that I explained to my 4-year old while we were all eating that daddy's words weren't nice ;)

Recently while reading Science and Health by Mary Baker Eddy, the following two passages stood out to me, "The destruction of sin is the divine method of pardon." And then a sentence of two later, "Being destroyed, sin needs no other form of forgiveness."

Just to clarify, sin to me is any action or choice that doesn't express my highest spiritual self. So, from those passages, it says to me that the only forgiveness needed is by learning from our mistakes - and not doing them again. I am not talking fire and brimstone here - but rather, you make a mistake, you screw up - but you learn from it and don't do it again. That is spiritual growth.

Now, we live in society with rules and laws, and I am not saying that learning from a mistake makes us exempt from the repercussions. But, when it comes to personal growth and personal forgiveness - we can free ourselves from the mistakes that we have made by learning from them and choosing not to do them again.

Unfortunately, many of us are unable to let go of mistakes from the past - and we continue to beat ourselves up still today. Have you learned your lesson? Can you let it go? If not, you'll be a prisoner to yourself until you can agree to forgive yourself and move on.

I learned my lesson - so I am moving on! Right honey?...honey?...right?...

Much love!

Travis

Happy New Year everyone!

It feels good to be blogging again - and I didn't want to waste anytime getting back at it in 2007! I want to thank everyone for all of your great comments and e-mails based on my last blog "No," - it really looks like I struck an inspiring nerve with all of you. My wife surprised me with a wonderful Christmas gift by taking all of my blogs from 2006 and publishing them into a hardcopy book. So, if you want to start off 2007 while reflecting a little bit on 2006 - I will have more details soon of how you can order Travis Inc. "2006 Autoblography!"

As I have shared with everyone - December was one crazy month. But, I took it one day at a time, one task at a time, and I didn't allow myself to get distracted or fooled by any of the speed bumps that popped up along the way.

Now that we are beginning a new year - my goal is to build on the momentum and discipline I had to exhibit this past month. I have spoken a few times about the "purpose statement" I created for myself last April. Once again, my purpose statement is as follows:

To...

Reflect only Love
Expect only Pefection
Accept only Truth
Project only Light

Yeah, it's also an acronym for "reap." So, if that is what I am trying to reap, I think I will be happy with what I am sowing ;)

This past month, I needed to put my purpose statement to work everyday. As I mentioned, there were a number of days when I wasn't sure how I was going to get things done, but going down a road of worry and fear wouldn't accomplish anything. It was during these times, when I would say, "No," and then remember that my only purpose was to "reflect love" in the work I was doing, "expect perfection" as the result of my labor, "accept Truth" as the only reality, and to "project Light" to everyone I came into contact with. That's it, period!

I couldn't worry about the outside factors, stress over what others were doing, or get caught up with what still needed to be done - instead, I just stook to my purpose statement.

Look at it. Four simple points. But, when applied to any situation or obstacle - those four simple ideas keep me on track - everytime!

Look at them. They leave no room for doubt. No room for fear. All I have to do is use my purpose statement as a framework for everything that I do. It gives me a measuring stick to hold every thought and action up against to make sure I am staying on purpose. That is all I need to do, because ultimately - my thoughts and actions are the only thing I can control.

Whatever happens as a result I can live with because I know it is the product of living my purpose. This is what it means to me to live Spirit - and let spirituality be an everyday part of my life.

So, 2007! My goal is to live my purpose statement everyday. I am expecting some big things in 2007, but I don't know what exactly they will be, and when they will happen. Do you ;)

So, I want to hear from you! Write your own purpose statement, and tell me how you are going to try to live to your highest purpose everyday. I would love to post some of your purpose statements for everyone to read. So please send them my way.

Much love to you all!

Travis